Changes

This time last year I was a completely different person. 

This time last year I was making promises to myself and to those around me that I did not keep.

This time last year I had become a person I did not even like to look at in the mirror.

This time last year I was the person I thought I would never become.

This time last year . . . I was someone I could barely recognize.

The changes I promised to make did not happen when I went back to school in January of 2010 . . . at least not until I hit rock bottom.

The worst place you could be in your life . . . or the best, because you can only go up from there.  That is what I needed.  I needed a boulder to hit me over the head, showing me the childish decisions I was making in my life.

And now?

When I think of my life . . . I smile.

When I look in the mirror . . . I smile.

When I think about my decisions . . . I smile.

When I think of the person I have become . . . I smile.

I have done everything this semester I said I would do (except for the whole going to the gym thing) and then went above and beyond.

I got (very) involved on campus.
I even surprised myself at the amazing grades I made.
I developed friendships that will last a lifetime.
I found an amazing guy who makes me smile everyday and makes me wonder how I ever got so lucky as to find him.
I have made my parents proud and able to brag to their friends about me (one of their favorite things to do).
I have made new friendships that I am so thankful for.
I have disconnected myself from destructive people and places.
I have found an amazing new church where I have and will grow closer to God.
I have witnessed God's presence in my life and let's just say . . . he's always very obvious about what he wants for me, and I have been truly blessed.

I cannot help but sit here and smile about the amazing things God has done in my life and he deserves so much credit for the woman I am becoming.

At times people ask if you could go back and do it all over again, would you?

Absolutely not.  It was all those . . . mistakes . . . that made me who I am, someone who I am proud of, someone who can stand proud about the decisions she is making.

I would do it all exactly the same because who knows if I had done it differently if all these amazing things would be happening in my life right now.  I'm not about to risk it.

So I say: Make lots of mistakes, because you never know what blessings they will bring you.

When I ring in the New Year I won't be setting resolutions or planning life changes or contemplating my decisions . . . I will be in the arms of the man that makes me the luckiest girl in the world, thanking God for all that he has given me, and praying that my friends and family achieve the same happiness I am experiencing, if only for a moment.

So I sit here . . . listening to Mumford and Sons sing to me in that mellifluous way they do so well . . . asking you . . . are you happy with who YOU have become?

Are you amazed at how far you have come this past year?

Are there mistakes that you've made that you haven't received the blessing from yet?

Are you the person you want to be?